Cover image courtesy of Reduced Shakespeare Company

The Ultimate Christmas Show (abridged)

Reed Martin and Austin Tichenor
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Recordings consist of 2 optional WAV backing tracks for production: "Mrs Santa Claus" and "HMCKH — Happy Merry Chrismakwanukkahanzukkah."

This title may also be purchased in the following bundle at 20% off the regular price: THE CHRISTMAS COLLECTION


Welcome to the Annual Holiday Variety Show and Christmas Pageant at St. Everybody’s Non-Denominational Universalist Church, where all faiths are welcome because we’ll believe anything. But there’s a problem: none of the acts scheduled to perform have arrived, so three members are pressed into service to perform the entire Variety Show and Christmas Pageant by themselves. An irreverent yet heartwarming trip through the holidays, THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW (ABRIDGED) is festive, funny, physical, family fun as these Three Wise Guys send up and celebrate our favorite holiday traditions.

Production Info

Cast: 3 total (3 male, as written; gender-diverse and/or expanded casts welcome)
Full Length Comedy (about 100 minutes)
Minimal Set Requirements
Contemporary Costumes
Category: Tags: ,

Press Quotes

“Critic’s Choice! They tell me vaudeville died some time ago, but … the knockabout, anything-for-a-laugh spirit of the ancient genre is alive and well. Agile and quick witted … there’s no denying their ingenuity when it comes to grabbing comedy out of thin air.” —Boston Globe

“Brought down the house with gales of laughter.” —Theatre Mirror

“A pure delight from start to finish … Inspired madness!” —Broadway World

“Delightfully twisted holiday cheer. Christmas will never be the same once you share the holiday with the inspired lunacy of the masters of condensing the classics.” —San Diego Theatre World

“Side-splitting!” —Nashua Telegraph

“THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW (ABRIDGED) will make your spirits bright, whether you joyfully embrace the upcoming season or get dragged into it kicking and screaming.” —Broadway World

“Nothing less than hysterical!” —Zingology

“Side-splitting fun … A night of belly-aching laughter!” —New England Theatre Geek

“Gloriously irreverent style … a Christmas pageant gone horribly, hilariously awry.” —Dallas Morning News

“THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW (ABRIDGED) [is a] zany, irreverent, side-sticker-inducing amalgam of vaudeville, improv and song. Thunderous, standing applause.” —Arts à la Mode, Charlotte, NC

“The bad boys of abridgment are in fine comedic form … This rollicking romp lovingly skewers every holiday tradition you can imagine.” —The Accidental Thespian, Washington, DC

“These brilliant clowns take us on an irreverent, but heartwarming trip through the holidays guaranteed to step on more than a few sacred cows and ‘mistel-toes.'” —San Diego Magazine

“Like no holiday show I have seen before … this trio of actors delivers a tour de force performance that left the room in stitches and exiting the theater still buzzing … an absolute delight!” —Edge San Diego

“Stunningly hilarious … a must see for your entire family!” —KDHX Radio, St. Louis

“Triumphant!” —Creative Loafing, Charlotte, NC

“A complete delight!” —Two On The Aisle, HEC TV, St. Louis

“It is a long time since I have seen an audience laugh as loud and as long as this. THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW (ABRIDGED) is a delight that will keep you smiling for days and a great way to get you in the true holiday spirit.” —LGBT Weekly, San Diego

About the Author


  • Reed Martin

    Reed Martin co-created and performed in the original productions of THE COMPLETE HISTORY OF AMERICA (ABRIDGED), THE BIBLE: THE COMPLETE WORD OF GOD (ABRIDGED), WESTERN CIVILIZATION: THE COMPLETE MUSICAL (ABRIDGED), ALL THE GREAT BOOKS (ABRIDGED), COMPLETELY HOLLYWOOD (ABRIDGED), THE COMPLETE WORLD OF SPORTS (ABRIDGED), THE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS SHOW (ABRIDGED), AND THE COMPLETE HISTORY OF COMEDY (ABRIDGED). He also contributed additional material to THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE (ABRIDGED). Reed is a managing partner of the Reduced Shakespeare Company and has performed in London's West End, at Lincoln Center Theater, Kennedy Center, Seattle Repertory Theatre, American Repertory Theatre, Pittsburgh Public Theater, California Shakespeare Festival, McCarter Theatre, Long Wharf Theatre, Old Globe Theatre, La Jolla Playhouse, Alabama Shakespeare Festival, The White House and Madison Square Garden, as well as in 11 foreign countries. Reed has performed at A.C.T. in San Francisco in Travesties by Tom Stoppard and The Government Inspector, as well as at the Magic Theatre in Moving Right Along, written and directed by Elaine May and featuring Marlo Thomas. He toured for two years as a clown/assistant ringmaster with Ringling Brothers/Barnum & Bailey Circus. His voice was heard in the animated feature film Balto,/i> and just about every other part of him was seen in the British film Carry On Columbus. Reed has written for the BBC, NPR, Britain's Channel Four, RTE Ireland, Public Radio International, The Washington Post and Vogue magazine. With Austin Tichenor he co-authored the book The Greatest Story Ever Sold, published by John Knox/Westminster Press, as well as Reduced Shakespeare: The Complete Guide For The Attention-Impaired (abridged), published by Hyperion. His work has been nominated for an Olivier Award in London, a Helen Hayes Award in Washington, D.C., and San Francisco Bay Area Theatre Critic's Circle Award. He has a BA in Political Science/Theatre from UC Berkeley, an MFA in Acting from UC San Diego and is a graduate of Ringling Brothers/Barnum & Bailey Clown College. A member of both the Dramatists Guild and The Stage Directors and Choreographers Society, Reed is also a former professional minor league baseball umpire. He lives in Northern California with his wife and two sons, all three of whom are much funnier than he is.

  • Austin Tichenor

    Austin Tichenor is a playwright, lyricist, songwriter, director, and actor. He's the co-author of nine COMPLETE (abridged) stage comedies, which have been produced around the world, published in two countries, and translated into over a dozen languages; the beautifully illustrated (by Jennie Maizels) children's book for all ages Pop-Up Shakespeare; the irreverent reference book Reduced Shakespeare: The Complete Guide for the Attention-Impaired (abridged); the comic memoir How The Bible Changed Our Lives (Mostly For The Better) for all e-book platforms; the half-hour film The Ring Reduced for UK's Channel 4; the half-hour pilot The Week Reduced for TBS; and the six episode Reduced Shakespeare Radio Show for the BBC World Service. He also produces and hosts the weekly Reduced Shakespeare Company Podcast, which was named one of Broadway World's Top Ten Podcasts for Theatre Fans. Austin is an alumnus of the BMI Musical Theatre workshop and has written over a dozen plays and musicals for young audiences. His full-length one-act DANCING ON THE CEILING (an adaptation of Kafka's "The Metamorphosis") and adaptation of FRANKENSTEIN are both published by Broadway Play Publishing, and he directed the world premiere of his adaptation of New York Times bestselling author Jasper Fforde's THE EYRE AFFAIR in 2016. As co-managing partner of the Reduced Shakespeare Company, he has performed with them around the world, Off-Broadway, in London's West End, in the PBS version of THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE (abridged), and at such theaters as the Kennedy Center, Lincoln Center, American Repertory Theatre, the Folger Shakespeare Theatre, Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, Pittsburgh Public Theatre, Merrimack Repertory Theatre, and Repertory Theatre of St. Louis. On TV, Austin played recurring roles on 24, Alias, Felicity, Ally McBeal, and The Practice, and guest starred as Guys In Ties on The West Wing, The X-Files, ER, The Mentalist, Nip/Tuck, Gilmore Girls, and on many other hours of episodic television. He's also performed his own material many times on NPR and the BBC, performed with both the Oakland Symphony and in Disney Hall with the Los Angeles Philharmonic, and acted in the midwest premiere of Lauren Gunderson's THE BOOK OF WILL at Chicago's Northlight Theatre, and in the world premiere of IN THE GARDEN: A DARWINIAN LOVE STORY with Chicago's Tony Award-winning Lookingglass Theatre Company. Austin is a fifth-generation Californian who was born on the 54th anniversary of the San Francisco Earthquake and the 185th anniversary of Paul Revere's Ride, which makes him older than he looks but short for his weight. Austin is a member of the Dramatists Guild, has a BA in History and Theatre from UC Berkeley and an MFA from Boston University, and currently lives in Chicago with his improviser and writer wife Dee Ryan, their two kids, and too many cats.

About the Book

Book Information

Publisher BPPI
Publication Date 5/15/2016
Pages 86
ISBN 9780881459302

Special Notes

Special Notes

Licensees are required to include the original stage producers credits in the following form on the title page in all programs distributed in connection with performances of the Play and in all advertising in which the full cast appears in size of type not less than ten percent (10%) of the size of the title of the Play:

Originally produced by Reduced Shakespeare Company

The following must appear within all programs distributed in connection with performances of the Play:
The Ultimate Christmas Show (abridged) is produced
by special arrangement with Broadway Play Publishing Inc, NYC

Rehearsal Video/Audio

Rehearsal Video

Note: This video is for rehearsal use only for the “Lil Nutzy” scene.

Rehearsal Audio

The tracks below demonstrate how the three major songs in the show should sound.

“All in One Christmas Carol” by Reed Martin and Austin Tichenor
Note: This song is sung a capella in the show.

“Mrs Santa Claus” by Reed Martin and Austin Tichenor

“HMCKH — Happy Merry Chrismakwanukkahanzukkah” by Reed Martin and Austin Tichenor


Upcoming and Recent Productions


11/24/2023 – 12/23/2023
Hippodrome State Theatre
Gainesville, FL

12/12/2019 – 12/15/2019
Wilde Rep Theatre
New Hartford, NY

11/7/2018 – 12/31/2018
Houston, TX

11/15/2017 – 12/31/2017
Cape May, NJ

12/2/2016 – 12/11/2016
Jefferson Performing Arts Society
Westwego, LA


12/7/2023 – 12/9/2023
Portland, OR

12/1/2022 – 12/17/2022
Stage Coach, Inc.
Boise, ID

11/17/2022 – 11/19/2022
Mount Saint Mary’s University
Emmitsburg, MD

11/16/2022 – 11/19/2022
Odyssey Productions Inc
Prince Albert, SK, Canada

7/8/2022 – 7/23/2022
Northern State University
Lake City, SD

12/3/2021 – 12/19/2021
Kailua Onstage Arts
Honolulu, HI

12/3/2021 – 12/19/2021
Kentwood Players
Los Angeles, CA

12/14/2019 – 12/14/2019
Chickasha Community Theatre
Chickasha, OK

12/13/2019 – 12/21/2019
Shoestring Community Players
St Helens, OR

12/13/2019 – 12/14/2019
Blank Conversations Theatre Company
Las Cruces, NM

12/6/2019 – 12/29/2019
Maryland Ensemble Theatre
Frederick, MD

12/6/2019 – 12/21/2019
The Barn Theatre
Porterville, CA

11/29/2019 – 12/15/2019
Kailua Onstage Arts
Kailua, HI

4/19/2019 – 4/19/2019
Macalester College
Saint Paul, MN

12/7/2018 – 12/15/2018
Casabuena Cp
Philadelphia, PA

12/7/2018 – 12/23/2018
Theatre In The Heights
Citrus Heights, CA

11/30/2018 – 12/15/2018
Renaissance Theatre
Lynchburg, VA

11/23/2018 – 12/9/2018
Adobe Rose Theatre
Santa Fe, NM

11/9/2018 – 11/17/2018
Theatre Huntsville
Huntsville, AL

12/14/2017 – 12/30/2017
Mammoth Lakes Repertory Theatre
Mammoth Lakes, CA

12/8/2017 – 12/17/2017
St. Dunstan's Theatre Guild of Cranbrook
Bloomfield Hills, MI

12/1/2017 – 12/9/2017
Greeley Garage Sale Theatre
Greeley, CO

12/1/2017 – 12/10/2017
Cumberland Players
Vineland, NJ

12/1/2017 – 12/17/2017
Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre
Atlantic Beach, FL

12/1/2017 – 12/17/2017
Inspire Theatre
Westland, MI

12/1/2017 – 12/16/2017
The Waterhouse, Inc
Peoria, IL

12/1/2017 – 12/9/2017
Encore Theatre Company
Elizabeth City, NC

11/30/2017 – 12/17/2017
Adobe Rose Theatre
Santa Fe, NM

11/24/2017 – 12/17/2017
Mountain Community Theatre
Ben Lomond, CA

11/11/2017 – 12/17/2017
Torrance Theatre Company
Torrance, CA

11/10/2017 – 11/18/2017
Blue Moon Productions
Lawton, OK

12/2/2016 – 12/17/2016
The Waterhouse, Inc
Peoria, IL

11/25/2016 – 12/3/2016
Theatre 8:15
Green, OH